The Suite Life Of Ian And Arif : Episode 1

Ian: I stopped dancing.I wasn't at the disco anymore and I was wearing glasses.I don't where glasses.My eyes refocused and for the first time,i could see where i was.I was on a stage in front of what,one...two...three...Six Billion people.I tried to speak...

Arif: Hello...

Ian: But all that came out was this strange shape covered with colours.The mix of colours was giving me a headache and I noticed that the mixed cube moved around.I wonder what intricute mysteries God would reveal to me if I solved the puzzle but everytime I moved the bit,it just got more mixed up until I decided to throw the cube into the air and when i caught it,it was somehow solved on all sides.I waited for God to reveal his intricute mysteries but God just said,"There is no cube! It's all in your head!" and when I looked back down at my hands,the cube just vanished.Then,there was a cry from the crowd.Someone shouted out,"Show us a card trick,wanker!"...

Idiot: Show us a card trick,wanker!

Ian: I was nervous and my hands began to sweat.Sometimes I sweat a little,sometimes I sweat a lot.Sometimes I sweat out a whole pack of cards and the box.I looked into the crowd for I needed someone to help me with my "Card Trick" when I realised that I couldn't see a thing...

Arif: Shit!

Ian: I do where glasses.I can't remember where i put them,though so i had to improvise,instead.I wandered over to a girl."Follow me," I said...

Arif: Follow me...

Ian: "Take a seat," I said...

Arif: Take a seat...

Ian: "I'm pleased to meet you," I said...

Arif: I'm pleased to meet you...

Ian: I lied...Then,i explained to her...

Arif: In this box,there are 52 cards.What I'm anout to do is just as well...

Ian: I decided to speak like an American.What dumb Americans,they are such good listeners so I continued by whispering into her ears...

Arif: Oi!!

Ian: What an idiot,I meant to say,"Name a card,any card." I'm rubbish at speaking to pretty girls.I always make them nervous but I think she understood what I meant,though because she named a card,anyway.I leaned in close so that I could hear her...

Girl: 3 of spades.

Ian: She said the 3 of spades...

Arif: The Queen of Hearts it is,then!

Ian: I tried to change her mind.It didn't work.Nervously,I opened the case and inside I found something that surprised even me.There was only one card in the case and when I showed it to the audience,they began to make this noise with their hands for it was the card she had freely named,the 3 of Spades! I looked smart and pretended that this coincidence was all just a part of my act.The girl was so impressed that she wanted to give me a kiss...On the lips...But she didn't.I wanted to take her hand...But...It was attached firmly to the end of her arm so I used it to lead her back to her seat.I did this in a style of a homosexual...You can't love what you can't have...When I got back on stage,I was wearing glasses again...

Both: I don't wear glasses!

Arif: You! You're always there,shouting out my thoughts like a Microphone!

Ian: ...I said...

Arif: No,you're not there! Get in my head!

Ian: ...I said...

Arif: I've always wanted to get rid of you! I talked to Paskalis,he gave me those pills!

Ian: Are you looking for this?

Arif: If you knew,you wouldn't even try this! You stopped me last time but since you're in my head,you can't be holding those pills! I have it...There!

Ian: Shit! I didn't take the pills!

Arif: I was silenced,I was breathless and then the boy covered me up in a sheet,out of sight,out of might.I was helpless.There was nothing I could do.I was forced to leave the boy I was controling alone and I vanished from his life forever!

Ian: Don't do this...

THE END